The dreaded teenage years and all the things that come with it – mood swings, “finding yourself”, social pressure, and so on. Unfortunately, depression and the side effects of being a teenager are often very similar (go figure). So what are some warning signs or red flags that let parents know “hey it’s time to reach out to a professional?”
Sleep:
We all know teens like to sleep in! In fact the National Sleep Foundation says that teens (ages 14-17) need an average of 8-10 hours per night to feel and function at their best. However, if your teen seems to sleep more than this on a regular basis OR has the opposite problem and can’t seem to sleep 8 straight hours, there may be something more going on (If this is the primary issue, insomnia could also be the culprit).
Depression is an interesting beast; sleep issues can even manifest in early morning with an inability to fall back to sleep. Due to life demands, sleep patterns can fluctuate a lot so if it is excessive sleep or little sleep, knowing what is going on with your teen is helpful in determining if the disturbances in this area are a warning sign. If you notice patterns lasting longer than 2 weeks then it may be time to seek professional help.
Isolating:
It’s normal for teens to crave independence from their parents or try and avoid their once beloved family movie night. Maybe they don’t really hang out with their childhood best friend anymore, and your teen’s friend group seems to change as often as the seasons. What is important is that they have a least a couple people they feel connected to (even if that changes frequently). Now if you notice your teen is pulling away from you, doesn’t seem to keep in touch with old friends, but also hasn’t made new friends this may be a sign of depression.
Losing interest in activities:
Interests change and can change frequently during adolescence while your teen tries to find their place in the world. Maybe they loved baseball and have played each year since T-Ball, but this year asked to switch to drama club, or wanted to learn how to play an instrument instead. While it may be sad to not register them for baseball this year and let go of those hopes of a college scholarship, this is not uncommon during these years.
However, if they want to quit baseball, and seem to have lost interest in other loved activities (like maybe reading or skateboarding), but don’t seem to be developing new hobbies in there place, nor do they seem interested in finding hobbies….this is a red flag.
Changes in mood:
I’m sure we can all recall our mood swings as a teen. I know I can and I’m sure glad they don’t happen (as often) anymore. Again, this can be a completely normal part of being a teen. As teens carve out who they want to be, they are learning to interact with strong emotions in a new ways, not to mention all of the frequent changes that can occur in life. Things are happening at a much faster rate than they were even 10 years ago. However, drastic and long lasting (2 weeks or more) changes in your teen’s mood or overall personality may suggest that it’s not just those raging hormones.
Talk of Death:
Lastly, if your teen is saying things like “sometimes I wish I wasn’t here anymore,” “I wish I could go to sleep and never wake up” or flat out saying they want to die – this is something that should be taken seriously. Sadly, the CDC reports that 11% of all teenage deaths in the US are by suicide (3rd leading cause!) and we know these numbers are rising. If your teen talks about death, it’s time to reach out to someone for their safety.
If you notice some of these “red flags” in your teen, they might actually be struggling with depression. It might be time to consult someone so your teen can have support as they navigate these years. Schedule a consult today.
Nina Moak, LPC-Intern has a passion for helping children and adolescents with a variety of concerns including behavioral issues, school performance, anxieties, social issues, depression, and common issues that accompany adolescence. Nina is a licensed professional counselor intern under the supervision of Carly Malcolm-Hoang LPC-S.